I know it has been a few weeks since I posted about diet, exercise and such, but there is good reason. For one, I didn’t want this site to be exclusively about my struggle with weight, it is about that and everything else. This site is supposed to be a place for me to treat like a personal diary that everyone can read. The second reason I really took a break is that I was kind of feeling that I was repeating myself. The last being that I was starting to really feel discouraged in all the work I was putting out.
The first two are easily solved. I am not going to have a post about weight everyday, and I might, I just need to figure that all out for myself. I need to come up with other topics I want to talk about and get back in the mode of a full range of things I want posted on this site, even if there is a lot of weight and diet included. The last part is the subject of this post.
I started all of this in spring of 2012, working hard, under doctors advice and plans, I really gave it a shot, but didn’t really take it real serious. That is until the following summer when I realized how important this all was and went full on with diet and exercise, pushing myself as hard as I could until time for me to have surgery. At that point I had lost a good 15 pounds, which is a lot less than the doctors projections. She had hoped I’d lose 20-25 pounds in that time with that plan.
Then I had my fusion done. There is something about open back surgery that makes you not hit those four mile marks for a while. I did have rehab, and I tried to not junk out on food when I couldn’t really move. It was around January of this year when I started back to the walking and some exercise. As I in February I started weighing myself again, and realized I had gained 5 pounds back from what I lost the year before. So in March I started back on the monitored diet, counting fat, counting calories, watching the sugar, drinking more water, and so on.
With all this back in place I am here 5 months later, that is 5 months from when I started walking again. While my walking back then was only about a quarter of a mile, but it was all I could do. Now I am walking a lot more than that, but I am still not to that 4 mile mark yet. Now a couple of weeks ago I realized that I was not just getting back into it, but I was 5 months in on walking, 4 months back on exercises and stretching, and 2 months in on a pretty heavily restricted diet, but I had not really lost anything. If you look at my tracking, I lose some, gain some, lose some, gain some, and so on. All this while following the same plan, eating the same things, at the same times, in the same portions. I knew that there was a yoyo effect that some people see when they start loosing weight, but this seemed to be going right back to where I started and I was staying in this same range.
Out of concern for my own health, and that I wasn’t doing something correctly, or that there might really be something wrong with me, I went back to the person that originally wanted me to lose weight in the first place, my doctor. I told her all of this and about the yoyoing. She ran a bunch of test on my blood to see what might be wrong with me. It seems there are a lot of things that can be wrong with you to be fat. The results of these tests were that I have none of those. Everything I was tested for, which included metabolism and metabolism diseases, thyroid issues, diabetes, and some other things with long names I couldn’t prononce much less remember how to spell.
Well the good news is that I am perfectly healthy. According to the lab work, I have no issues with my thyroid or metabolism, nor do I have any of those other diseases. Well, that’s good news, at least it was until I realized that, according to those tests, I ate me fat. I don’t have any other reason I can point it to. The regular meds I am on don’t cause over eating or slowed metabolism. I don’t have a genetic disorder that they can find, or any diseases to pin it on. I am just fat, and I can only blame my love of pizza on being fat. Ok, ok, that might sound harsh, but I am actually ok with it. I hate those people who blame this or that or whatever, and I’m not blaming the makers of the pizza for it, I’m the one that ate it. So, I am fat, because I like food that makes you fat.
But where did this news leave me? Ok, I’m fat, and there is nothing wrong with me, so why can’t I lose the weight despite sever dieting and as much exercising as I can do without harming my still healing back? Apparently that answer is unknown, or it’s too expensive to find out. My doctor got be back in her office, and after a lot of discussion on the matter, it boils down to the fact that I am still too fat. Now my doctor wouldn’t put it like that, although I do at times wish doctors would be more blunt with you, but she said something more along the lines of how I needed to reduce my overall weight as a permanent part of pain management and this was concord by my surgeon and the pain management professional. Ok, so I am not just fat, but three doctors agree that I am too fat.
When it was all said and done, she gave me a script for weight loss drugs. I have been against these in the past, and actually I rarely take any narcotic medication, but I felt like I was out of options at this point. I have a doctor telling me that this is so important that she not only thinks I need to take something to make it happen faster, but a doctor that in the past has always explored every possible option before going to this kind of drug, as well as two doctors agreeing with her on the importance of me not being so fat anymore.
I took the script and thought about it a little bit, last week when I got it. I had it filled, but looked at it and looked it up for a couple of days before finally starting it. I still am not happy about the idea of what I am doing, but know that if this really helps that I will be thrilled about the weight loss. There are real pros and cons to this route though.
Pros of weight loss medication is that is usually works. It helps you really drop weight, especially if you do your part and eat right and exercise.
Cons of these pills is a lot longer of a list. The biggest con is how they work. Most weight loss medication, including the kind I am using now, is a chemical that is closely related to amphetamines. It does exactly what that does. It causes you to loose your apatite and increases both your metabolism and your drive to be doing something constantly, so with the loss of food and increase in movement, you lose weight much faster. This may sound to most like a pro, but the problem is that when you get to the weight that the doctor sets as the goal, your done. Then you are left without it, and that brings us to the second con. They are well-known for being addictive. While these won’t give you the high that amphetamines can give you, the increased productivity, weight loss, and adapted habits that you can get yourself into by taking these everyday, can all become very addictive without the high.
At this point I have noticed an increase in metabolism due to the increased amount of water I am drinking, a lose in apatite and a side effect of being much more talkative, I just seem to have a lot more to say. This isn’t the worst side effect, and those are what the pills are supposed to do, but I go into this with both hope and caution. The loss in apatite though really isn’t how it sounds, I don’t get sick when eating too much, or full faster, but I more have lost some of my interest in food. I am not seeking it out, other than to remind myself that I need to eat something. The last of the cons is what happens when I stop taking it. I don’t want to lose the entire 80 pounds I was over weight, and then gain it back. I know that my habits will play a big part in that, but I do feel that without anyone knowing why I haven’t been able to stabilize, or lose, my current weight, I could just as easily gain weight back. If I’m doing everything right now and not loosing, will I be able to keep it gone? That is something I am going to press for more options on from the doctor in my next appointment next month.
Well I really wanted that all out of my system, and I did with a really long post. I will continue to post on my progress. Hopefully future posts wont need to carry on this long.